Monday, May 11, 2009

Stupid clinic

The clinic called back and said they incorrectly scheduled hubby's test tomorrow. He not only needs to do a SA but also a SPA (as well as blood work). And they only do SPA's on Wednesday's. Grrrr! I was pretty upset about this stupid scheduling mistake. He was much more so. He asked me "if they get things like this wrong, how can we trust them to get other things right?" He is correct. If they can't schedule a stupid appointment based on their own damn checklist, how do we know that they will be able to stim, retrieve, grow, and transfer without f***ing things up? The answer is, we don't know. All we can do is look at their numbers and see that they have done enough things right in the past to have had some pretty good results. Too bad past performance doesn't guarantee future results.

I am so scared that we are going to get to the end of this and fail miserably. And then my hubby is going to turn to me and say "I could have told you so." He has done this before, once and only once--not related to infertility, but it was such a sever pain I still remember the hurt. He apologized then and even again today for that past pain but once burnt, twice shy. I hate that IF brings our weaknesses to the forefront. I truly believe that not all relationships are strong enough to withstand IF. I am just hoping that ours is.

No comments: